Online dating recovering alcoholics


10-Mar-2016 10:25

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“If Daddy came home from work and poured himself a drink at the end of the day, she learned that the way Daddy managed stress was through alcohol.”Important information.

Making drinks, Didion writes in a section about how the infant Quintana was adopted, “was what we did in our family to mark any unusual, or for that matter any usual, occasion.” In other words, alcohol was used quite frequently in that family system—to deal with both ordinary and extraordinary occasions.

So, to answer Hokemeyer’s question: Yes, Quintana’s father, John Gregory Dunne, did manage stress through alcohol.

Right up to the very end of his life, in fact: on his final evening, after coming home from an extraordinarily stressful visit to the hospital where Quintana lay in critical condition, her father asked for a second Scotch before he had finished his first, then, as he drank, he suffered a massive coronary event that killed him. It unfortunately has the ability to distort the thinking of even our most beloved intellectuals and artists and, ultimately, to hide the full truth of their stories.

Think about what she is saying here: no one has ever said booze is no good at controlling anxiety. I can think of a dozen eminent ones offhand who would counter this claim.

As for “no one” ever suggesting this, I have only to key into Google the words “alcohol anxiety”—the results are legion. When she decides to turn her reporter’s eye on a subject, usually no detail is left unexamined, no narrative thread left dangling, so it was the passage above, coupled with a story about Didion that ran in advance of the book’s release, that made me want to take a closer look at how addiction is examined—or not examined—in her memoir about her daughter.

I’ve often wondered about Didion’s daughter, who was about my age and who was brought up in much different circumstances, living first in "the beach house" in Malibu and then in posh Brentwood, and later moving to New York City. National Library of Medicine reports that 70 percent of cases of acute pancreatitis in the U. are due to “alcoholism and alcohol abuse.” In a 2009 article titled, “It’s the Alcohol, Stupid,” authors writing for a Nature Publishing Group journal state, “Overuse of alcohol is a major cause of acute and chronic pancreatitis in both developed and developing countries. Prolonged overconsumption of alcohol for 5-10 years typically precedes the initial attack of acute alcoholic pancreatitis.”Despite Didion’s skill as an investigator, despite her admissions that Quintana “drank too much” and that she died of acute pancreatitis, the words “alcoholism” or “addiction” are not mentioned anywhere in the book., Didion admits that her daughter drank a great deal in her teenage years, but she repeatedly averts her eyes from the idea that Quintana’s drinking was a critical health problem.

(I was born in working-class rustbelt territory and grew up in suburban Pittsburgh—generic American Strip-Mall Land.) While in Quintana died at 39 of acute pancreatitis. Here is an astonishing passage in which the narrator of uses a ten-foot pole to circle around the issue of her daughter's addiction without touching it: "She was depressed. Because she was depressed and because she was anxious she drank too much. Alcohol has its own well-known defects as a medication for depression but no one has ever suggested—ask any doctor—that it is not the most effective anti-anxiety agent yet known." I had to read these sentences perhaps three times before I understood that, in them, the author of (books I’ve read so many times I can recite many sentences by heart) was making some serious errors in her analysis.

In the , in the same story in which Didion calls her daughter an alcoholic, she also says she believes that her daughter’s acute pancreatitis was caused by (wait for it) a rare case of avian flu. This laid-back Malibu beachfront rehab charts a holistic path to recovery, which suits the twenty- and thirtysomethings who come here—you just might have to clock a few extra miles on the sand to burn off Chef Monte’s hearty home-cooking.“There’s no such term as ‘alcohol personality disorder,’ and it’s not a helpful term.”I asked Seppala whether he’s seen alcoholics come to Hazelden with previously-recorded psychiatric diagnoses that prove nonexistent, or at least are mitigated, once the alcoholism is treated—once the person abstains and begins to work on recovery.“What you’re describing is fairly commonplace,” he said.